Real Life

Coffee Talk: The Art of Saying No and Why It Might Change Your Life for the Better

Hi, friend! Long time, no talk. I’ve been completely M.I.A. In the past when I took time off from blogging, I tried to keep up on Instagram. But, I haven’t even done that. If there was a grade scale for blogging, I’d get a big fat F. Or maybe even a G, if that’s a thing.

To be honest with you, I’m overwhelmed.

And I know, I know. We’re all overwhelmed. We’re all busy. It’s not an excuse. But if you’re a “yes” person like me, the feeling of overwhelm is something that’s all too familiar. And that can be problematic to your health, your relationships and your sanity.

So, let me ask you this — why do we keep saying YES?

I can tell you why I do. I’m a “yes person” and a certified people-pleaser. I’m also afraid if I say no to anything — whether it’s a happy hour, new photography project or assignment at work, I’ll miss out on a killer opportunity that could be the turning point in my career. Most of the time, though, when I bust my ass to take on extra projects, they rarely turn out to be worth the level of stress and anxiety I feel.

So, for all you “yes” people reading this, here are some tips to break the habit.


Stress manifests itself in a variety of ways. If you’re experiencing chest tightness (check), shortness of breath (check) and fatigue (is it time for bed yet?), this could be your body’s way of telling you to slow down. Take a minute to listen.


One of the benefits of saying no is that you free yourself up to say yes to projects that really matter. Trust your intuition. If you have the opportunity to take on a project you’re feeling lukewarm about, you know in your gut it’s something you should say no to.


If you take on more are you going to be able to make your deadlines and deliver quality work? If you say yes to one friend’s get together, are you still going to be able to make it to your other friend’s birthday party across town? If you know you have too much on your plate, be realistic.


You can do anything you put your mind to, but accept the fact that you can’t do everything, and that’s more than okay. You’re only one person after all. Give yourself a little grace from time to time. You’re doing the best you can.

How has saying no helped you? I’d love to know.

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